


save the pineapples

by memelord69yee



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Chatting & Messaging, Cuban Lance (Voltron), Drinking, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Gay Keith (Voltron), Hunk (Voltron) is so Pure, Lance & Pidge | Katie Holt Friendship, Latte week 2017, M/M, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Swearing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-15
Updated: 2017-08-25
Packaged: 2018-12-15 17:00:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11810313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/memelord69yee/pseuds/memelord69yee
Summary: Sirlancelot : I am offendedSirlancelot : this new hot dood helped me out though anywayGordon ramsay but nice : new dood?





	1. chapter one

**Author's Note:**

> English is not my first language I also wrote this at like 3am enjoy?
> 
> sirlancelot lance  
> gaylien keith  
> lesbean pidge  
> shiroGONE shiro  
> matteroni matt  
> goddess allura  
> gordon ramsay but nice hunk

**Save the pineapples 2:17pm**

 

 

 **Sirlancelot** : Did anyone study for the test today????

 

 **Gaylien** : which test??

 

 **Gordon** **ramsay but nice** : I love you Keith but what are u doin with ur life?

 

 **Lesbean** : yesterday he wanted to steal a hippo from the zoo

 

 **Lesbean** : and beyonce noone of us studied

 

 **Sirlancelot** : dafuq pete wentz why do u wanna steal sth w/out me

 

 **Sirlancelot** : I am offended

 

 **Sirlancelot** : this new hot dood helped me out anyway

 

 **Gordon** **ramsay** **but** **nice** : new dood?

 

 **ShiroGONE** : keith

 

 **ShiroGONE** : I am ur brother but

 

 **ShiroGONE** : wha-??

 

 **Gaylien** : let me live

 

 **Lesbean** : u wouldn't even survive one day w/out us pete wentz

 

 **Gaylien** : shut ur fuck bill nye

 

 **Sirlancelot** : he looks kinda like pidge but more manly and taller??

 

 **Sirlancelot** : welp he asked me out

 

 **Sirlancelot** : srry @goddess can't come tonite have a date!

 

 **Lesbean** : is this hot new dood called matt?

 

 **Sirlancelot** : yea! How do u know???

 

 **Lesbean** : he is ma brother

 

 **Lesbean** : u re going on a date w my brother!!

 

 **Sirlancelot** : srry??

 

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : run.

 

 **Gaylien** : how hot can he be if he's bill nye's brother?

 

 **Lesbean** : run pete wentz

 

 **Lesbean** : I am coming for all of you

 

 **ShiroGONE** : kids calm down

 

 **ShiroGONE** : noone's gonna die today

 

 **Goddess** : too late we are all already dead

 

 **Goddess** : it's ok lonce just keep me updated

 

 **Lesbean** : ...

 

 **Sirlancelot** : gotta go iverson is comin

 

 **Gaylien** : one time I hit iverson while I dabbed

 

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : sometimes I am questioning ur life decisions

 

 **Goddess** : we all do

 

 **ShiroGONE** : what happened queef u once were a nice lil kiddo

 

 **Gaylien** : life happened...

 

 

**Save the pineapples 11:45pm**

 

 

 **Sirlancelot** : pidge

 

 **Sirlancelot** : piiidgeee

 

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : are u ok?

 

 **Sirlancelot** : bill nye the science guy

 

 **Lesbean** : WHO DARED TO SAY THE Name of the one and only tru god ??

 

 **Lesbean** : wassup beyonce

 

 **Sirlancelot** : ur brother is perfect

 

 **Sirlancelot** : a gift from the gods

 

 **Goddess** : who

 

 **ShiroGONE** : the hot new dood aka matt aka pidges brother aka my best friend

 

 **Gaylien** : ha lance

 

 **Sirlancelot** : what do u want pete wentz

 

 **Gaylien** : u re fucked

 

 **Sirlancelot** : shut ur fuck

 

 **Sirlancelot** : I didn't??know???

 

 **ShiroGONE** : it's ok lance

 

 **Lesbean** : it is so not ok

 

 **Lesbean** : he just came back from a year long missions and instead of spendings time w me he spends time w u

 

 **Sirlancelot** : re u jealous?

 

 **Lesbean** : bithc u gonna catch these hands

 

 **ShiroGONE** : cAlM yO tItZ kiddos

 

 **Goddess** : ....

 

 **Goddess** : is shiro drinking again?

 

 **Gaylien** : I tried to stop him

 

 **Gaylien** : and I failed

 

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : keith

 

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : are u stoned again?

 

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : w/out me??

 

 **Gaylien** : I tried not to be

 

 **Gaylien** : and I failed

 

 **Lesbean** : failed wut?

 

 **Gaylien** : life

 

 **Goddess** : wut is this chat even???

 

 **Sirlancelot** : yo can I add matt?

 

 **Sirlancelot** : idk my man

 

 **Lesbean** : try me

 

 **Sirlancelot** : u re like twelve ??

 

 **Lesbean** : but so re u

 

 **Sirlancelot** : on a scale from 1-10 yea I'm 12

 

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : just add him already

 

 **Gaylien** : this will go down in history

 

 **Goddess** : WE WILL MAKE HISTORY

 

 **ShiroGONE** : I'm in tears

 

 **ShiroGONE** : keith just sang the opening to yoi and jumped out of the window

 

 **Sirlancelot** : is he ok???

 

 **Lesbean** : they live on the first floor so prob

 

 **Gaylien** : yea I am fine

 

 **Gaylien** : was worth it

 

 **Sirlancelot** : I am queef , a furry, and I like to spring in volcanoes, ride on hippos and have a death wish

 

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : good one Lance!

 

 

**Sirlancelot added matteroni**

 

 

 **Matteroni** : I lived, bitchez


	2. Pineapple pizza

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sirlancelot lance  
> gaylien keith  
> lesbean pidge  
> shiroGONE shiro  
> matteroni matt  
> goddess allura  
> gordon ramsay but nice hunk   
> The gorgeous moustache man coran
> 
>  
> 
> I wrote this at 3am

**Save the pineapples 3:31am**

 

 **Sirlancelot** : pineapples re really great

 **Matteroni** : yee they are

 **Lesbean** : back at it again with the pineapples

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : pineapple pizza!! !

 **Sirlancelot** : hunk I luv u but no

 **Matteroni** : I agree

 **Lesbean** : how could u!! Bro???

 **ShiroGONE** : have I told u the story of keith and hot topic yet?

 **Gaylien** : noone cares let's talk bout the deliciousness of pineapple pizza

 **ShiroGONE** : he wemt to three different hot topics and tgen realized it was a holiday and all stores were closed

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : keith wu t???

 **Gaylien** : I was 12 OK

 **sirlancelot** : ur profil pic is of a motorbike

 **Lesbean** : u listened to wttbp on repeat yesterday

 **Matteroni** : u wear fingerless gloves in summer for aesthetic purpose

 **Goddess** : u wash ur hair once a month

 **Gaylien** : leave me alone

 **Gaylien** : I hate u all

 **Gaylien** : especially u takashi

 **ShiroGONE** : u re welcome

 

**ShiroGONE renamed the chat to queefs secret lover hot topic**

 

 **gaylien** : I hate u 

 

  
**Queefs secret lover hot topic 3:27pm**

 

 **Sirlancelot** : ONG GUYS

 **Sirlancelot** : matt is an actual angel

 **Sirlancelot** : a guft from the gods

 **Sirlancelot** : I could kiss him rn

 **Lesbean** : did he fix ur laptop?

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : did he made u food?

 **Matteroni** : do it

 **Matteroni** : kiss me

 **Matteroni** : what's holding you back

 **Sirlancelot** : ...

 **Sirlancelot** : first of all I'm offended

 **Lesbean** : b ro

 **Sirlancelot** : KEITH GET UR EMO ASS OVER HERE I HAT E U

 **gaylien** : I have done nothing wrong my entire life

 **Sirlancelot** : sure got topic,,,

 **Gaylien** : u just called me hot..

 **Sirlancelot** : the only hot persons in this chat are hunk and matt

 **Sirlancelot** : shit imma leave

 **Matteroni** : ...

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : awww thenk

 **Goddess** : what the f u ck lonce

 **Lesbean** : ...

 **ShiroGONE** : re u ok pidge I heard u scream????

 **Lesbean** : internal pain

 **Lesbean** : beyonce get ur filthy habds of my b ro!!!

 **The gorgeous moustache man** : I hear drama who called my name?

 **Goddess** : now u show up

 **Goddess** : typically

 **Matteroni** : where the ever loving shit is lance

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : kitchen

 **Matteroni** : thanks hunk

 **Sirlancelot** : traitor

 **Gaylien** : I'm enjoying this

 **Lesbean** : queef shut ur filthy hot topic loving gay mouth

 **Gaylien** : meet at 7 behind denny's we gonna fite

 **Lesbean** : ...

 **Matteroni** : no

 **Lesbean** : bithc u gonna catch these hands

 **Sirlancelot** : have dun dying bro

 **ShiroGONE** : DONT FUCK WITH PIDGE

 **The gorgeous moustache man** : is that a song?

 **Lesbean** : it should be

 **Gordon ramsay but nice** : let's stop this drama and eat my food

 **Goddess** : hunk u know the words to my heart

  
**Matteroni to Sirlancelot 3:47am**

 

 **Matteroni** : u think I am hot?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter will prob be longer. I hope u enjoyed it though


End file.
